Listen now (46 mins) | And why fathers need to reckon with the link between rape culture and the everyday inequities of hetero marriage. Part II of our look at the Cornell case.
And why fathers need to reckon with the link between rape culture and the everyday inequities of hetero marriage. Part II of our look at the Cornell case.
One of the popular sentiments that has been going around in response to the Cornell 7 case is, essentially: “Stop teaching girls how to protect themselves. Teach boys not to rape.” Now, in this episode, we want to take a serious look at this suggestion—because we agree. The onus is put on girls to “stay safe out there.” Not nearly enough is done to teach boys to be safe to be around.
So, how can you talk with boys about consent, sexual assault, and rape? How can you raise a boy who will not sit by quietly in the group chat—saying nothing, doing nothing—as his friends text each other about “free pussy”? And where, exactly, are the straight dads in this conversation—and have they reckoned with the link between rape culture and the everyday inequities of hetero marriage?
In this episode we talk about:
What it means to put feminist thinking into action at home as so-called “boy moms”
A recent interaction that led one of our kids to announce: “This makes me not want to tell you anything”
The pressure put on mothers to fix patriarchy
Teaching boys that it’s better to be an outsider than to find belonging in cruelty
Whether fraternities should exist at all???
Why fathers need to be having these conversations with their sons, not just moms
How the bar for dads is underground
“Healthy masculinity” versus healthy humanity
How the prosaic discontents that we see in hetero relationships—and which we talk about all the time on this podcast—are all part of the indoctrination of boys into rape culture.
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