Questioning the existence of a 'self' as a memoirist writing about the selfAlso: reading about monogamy, men's 'equality crisis,' and an orgasm cult.No “take” this week. No essay. Just a quick little peak at what I’ve been feeding my heart and brain right now. Monogamy by Adam PhillipsI’m slowly pulling thread for a future Dire Straights episode on monogamy that asks: What is it? Why is it? Clearly, I had to buy this book titled, simply, Monogamy. It’s written by a psychoanalyst and basically consists of a bunch of aphorisms about monogamy, fidelity, and desire. It’s alright. Maybe a little too cute. A little too impressed with itself. But I did underline these passages:
All We Want is Everything by Soraya ChemalyI just started reading a review copy of Soraya Chemaly’s book, which systematically analyses male supremacy—in our homes, schools, workplaces, and the hallways of political power. I’m only a few chapters in, but it’s already so refreshingly clear-eyed and morally grounded in its assessment of our current moment—take, her reframing of men’s “loneliness crisis” as an “equality crisis.” I double-underlined this bit:
Buddhism Without Beliefs by Stephen BatchelorI picked this one up used for like $2 at Pegasus in Berkeley. I want to joke that reading this is part of a post-memoir-writing crash-out. You write about the self, an inner journey of discovery, and wrangle it all into a single coherent narrative, only to question the very existence of a self. But I actually think that this book’s story of self-discovery—or “finding myself,” as the subtitle puts it—is about stumbling onto a broader and more interwoven sense of identity and existence. Also, I’ve been doing this kind of reading—for a few years now (quietly and somewhat bashfully, which is probably something to write about). Anyway, I dig this book. Just one of many passages I’ve underlined:
Also, ICYMI, I’ll be in conversation with Ellen Huet about her fantastic book Empire of Orgasm: Sex, Power, and the Downfall of a Wellness Cult on November 18 at Green Apple Books in San Francisco. I’m sure I’ll be writing more about this book in the near future, but for now, go pre-order!Paid subscribers make this newsletter possible. Will you upgrade to support the work I do here every week? It’s only $6 a month. (Or $5 a month with an annual subscription.) Paid subscribers get full access to my weekend roundups, as well as a discount on Dire Straights, my new podcast with Amanda Montei. |
četvrtak, 23. listopada 2025.
Questioning the existence of a 'self' as a memoirist writing about the self
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