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| | Grief is a deeply personal experience. The journey isn't neat or linear, and it doesn't follow any timelines or schedules. Everyone feels it differently and copes with it in their own ways — over the course of weeks, months, or even years.
Today, we're taking time to reflect on how we navigate grief. Read our team's experiences below, and as always, feel free to email us with your thoughts on this week's question. |  | | |
| Q | | How do you manage grief? | | | | A | | "To be honest, I didn't allow myself to grieve the first decade after losing my dad. I practiced a bit of denial. I did this while simultaneously throwing myself into advocacy networks and grassroots events. That, in itself, was a way to cope, I suppose. Once I allowed myself to experience it fully, it was painful and exhausting.
As I near the 20-year anniversary, I'm more compassionate toward myself and my feelings. It never goes away, but you do find ways to carry it with you. I've found writing letters to him, acknowledging things in my environment that make me think of him (like spotting his car on the highway or seeing an ad for something silly he bought years ago), and letting myself feel my feelings are the only way through. He'll always be with me because I'm part of him. Oh, and therapy. Lots of therapy." — Samantha Costa, editor
"I find a lot of value and comfort in hearing from others. We all experience grief, and it's a good reminder that we're never alone in navigating life after loss. Joan Didion's "Year of Magical Thinking" really helped me through a dark period when being vulnerable about my own experience felt too hard to put into words." — Angela Purcaro, director of social media strategy
"Navigating grief is a complex journey that requires patience and self-awareness. I find that checking in with myself, acknowledging where I'm at within the stages of grief, and accepting that processing loss isn't linear can help me understand how I'm feeling in any given moment." — Kristen Taylor Carlisle, health coach
"Acknowledge it when it shows up. I like that saying, 'Your grief doesn't shrink overtime, you grow around your grief.'" — Kristen Hom, photo editor
"I had a tough time with this one, because I'm not sure I've been particularly good at 'managing' grief. My best friend died when he was only 18, and while almost 2 decades have passed, it still weighs on me. In one sense, it can be harder with the passage of time. In the immediate aftermath, people are often close to you and ready and willing to offer comfort and support. But later on, you find that the grief still sits with you when others seem to have carried on with their lives. It can be harder to reach out to others, and you begin to feel alone in your grief.
I take solace in remembering that grief is an ongoing expression of love. That helps remind me that, though I am sad for the loss of my friend, our love continues. For me at least, it can help reframe thoughts of pain from the loss into positive memories, and thinking about how that person continues to live on in me — not just in my memories, but in my personality, language, decisions, etc. — and that brings a little peace." — A.L. Heywood, engagement editor | | | | | | | Responses have been edited for clarity.
If you'd like to request a specific topic, offer feedback, or chime in with your answers to our weekly questions, feel free to email us at newsletters@healthline.com. We look forward to connecting with you and supporting you on the path to mental well-being. | | | |
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