In 2024, it's difficult not to talk about politics. Whether your people are wearing the merch, posting memes, or re-hashing that debate, political talk is in the air.
For a lot of us, it feels like candidates, elections, laws, and Supreme Court rulings are lurking around any given conversation, waiting to ruin the vibes and leave everyone annoyed. Even talking about the weather can feel tense with someone who's still got questions about the whole climate change thing.
Of course, chatting through our beliefs, values, and how the people in charge do their jobs is an important part of living in a democracy. It helps us learn about each other, find commonalities, share our perspective, and flex those First Amendment rights.
So why does ~getting political~ in social settings often feel so bad? Well, if you're talking politics with someone who doesn't have the same views as you, that conversation can make you feel literally threatened, says psychologist Tania Israel, PhD.
And if you feel judged for your views during those chats, it can seem like your whole way of life is under attack, says clinical psychologist Steven Meyers, PhD. That's because our life experiences, like where we came from, who raised us, and what we read, can inform the issues we feel deeply about, he explains. Our political beliefs can feel like a summation of our identity as a whole.
Even if your friends and fam agree with your perspective, these conversations can activate your emotions. Maybe your friends don't seem to care enough—or they care too much and you just want to stop thinking about it. It's a lot! And since miscommunications abound when we're starting from a place of stress, it can get really messy, really fast.
We spoke with experts about how to handle those convos (or see yourself out of them) so you can protect your peace and keep your relationships intact.
1. Do a self assessment.
Sometimes these convos pop up out of nowhere. Other times, you might know that your uncle will stir the pot at the next family event. Either way, when it comes up (or before it does), check in with yourself to see if engaging in these topics makes sense for your current situation, says Dr. Meyers.
If not, it's totally fine to see yourself out or end a conversation. "Many people think closeness or intimacy means being able to share all of your thoughts and feelings with someone, but that's not true," Dr. Meyers says. Divulging every idea in your head—especially about political issues that might mean a lot to your friends and family—can trigger resentment, hostility, and conflict, he explains. "It's OK to be selective for the sake of preserving your relationship."
Keep reading for 5 more tips on navigating challenging political convos.
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