⏰ Permission to chill

Plus sober dating tips and books that feel like therapy.

View this email in your browser MONDAY WARMUP 💪 Try this: Make a list of all the activities that make you feel happy, centered, and whole. A coffee walk? Calling your sibling? Looking at some art? Trying a new workout? Save this list and refer back to it the next time you're in A Mood and need to turn your day around. Think on this: What's a limiting thought or belief that might be holding you back from a life you'd love? Where do you think that idea came from? Remember this: Worrying won't affect the outcome. Read this: How to Deal If Panic Attacks Are Ruining Your Life WELL, THIS IS DELIGHTFUL ✨ 13 books by LGBTQ+ authors that feel like therapy  Calling all homebodies: these date ideas are for you 5 ways to give yourself a damn break today Could tarot and astrology help you cope with anxiety? Nothing will come between us and overthinking Were you forwarded this email? Click here to subscribe for free. LET'S TALK NUMBERS If you, like us, were benchwarmers in high school then the thought of playing sports might send a chill up your spine. But it might just be worth pushing past the shame of our awkward hand-eye coordination and flimsy understanding of the rules. According to a recent survey, a whopping 84% of Americans who participate in sports say it benefits their mental health. Desperate times call for desperate measures so, in that case, put me in coach? ASKING FOR A FRIEND 📞 I recently stopped drinking and dating feels extra uncomfy. Do you have any tips for dating while sober? For starters, you're not wrong if you feel like alcohol is never not served where dates happen. And that's not ideal if you're trying to avoid it or don't trust that you can when it's on the menu. Then there's the whole judgment and rejection thing. Will the person you're going out with be cool with your sobriety? Will they be freaked out by the reasons you're not drinking? Those questions can also make sober dating extra intimidating, says psychotherapist and licensed clinical alcohol and drug counselor Jason Berenberg, LPC, LCADC. Going into a date without a buzz might also mean feeling less confident, sexy, or flirty than you had after a glass or two, explains Tawny Lara, author of Dry Humping: A Guide to Dating, Relating, and Hooking Up Without the Booze, who's been alcohol-free and in recovery since 2015. It's a lot harder to relax in the presence of a new person without that liquid courage, you know? So, yeah, sober dating is not for the faint of heart, but it might also be better than you expected. Here, we spoke with therapists and sober daters for the things that helped them or their clients feel good and make meaningful connections minus the booze. Take what works for you!  1. Know your limits. "If you're someone who doesn't drink, then it's up to you to determine what your limits are when it comes to dating. Can you be around alcohol socially without compromising your values or sobriety? Can you kiss someone who has alcohol on their breath? Can you date someone whose lifestyle revolves around drinking? Each person will be different." —relationship therapist and dating coach Michelle Herzog, LMFT, CST  2. Don't settle for disrespect. "Sobriety is a huge part of my identity, and I'm very comfortable talking about it. But if someone surrounds themself with drinking and doesn't respect your own sobriety, it won't work. It's not a good fit, and it's not worth rolling the dice with your life." —Jay D., 43  Keep reading for 15 more tips on making sober dating way less stressful. READ MORE ON THAT NOTE 10 People Share Why They Quit Drinking and How It's Going Why You Feel Like a Ball of Anxiety the Day After Drinking READ MORE READ MORE 10 People Share Why They Quit Drinking and How It's Going READ MORE Why You Feel Like a Ball of Anxiety the Day After Drinking READ MORE 🎧 What we're listening to: Feeling tough. NEED HELP NOW? These resources can help. SAMHSA National Helpline Suicide Prevention Lifeline The Trevor Project Trans Lifeline Advertise With Us PR Inquiries Want to unsubscribe? Click here to take a break.   Copyright © 2022 Wondermind. All rights reserved.   228 Park Avenue South, Suite 26327, New York, NY 10003   All products featured on Wondermind are independently selected by our editors. However, when you buy something through our retail links, we may earn an affiliate commission.   DISCLAIMER: THIS NEWSLETTER DOES NOT PROVIDE MEDICAL ADVICE The information contained in this newsletter is for informational purposes only. This newsletter is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition or treatment and before undertaking a new health care regimen, and never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read in this newsletter.