Why “just try harder” doesn't work for ADHD brains

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	Forwarded this email? Subscribe here for more Hey friend—this newsletter is supported by readers like you. If you love it or find value from it, consider becoming a paid supporter! You’ll unlock every article in the archive and gain full access to the Member Resource Hub. Upgrade now ADHD Myths: People with ADHD Are Lazy or Lack Willpower Why “just try harder” doesn't work for ADHD brains Jesse J. Anderson Jul 9   READ IN APP   Photo by Morgan Vander Hart on Unsplash One of the most pervasive myths about ADHD is that people with ADHD are just lazy. If they would just “try harder”, they would suddenly have enough willpower to get things done. But ADHD motivation doesn’t work like that. Our biggest motivational struggles often look like us just sitting on the couch staring at our phone. While in our head, we scream at our brain: “Get up! Get off the couch! Put down the phone! Just get up and go do the thing! It’ll be easy if you just do it! Get up! Stop staring at your phone! Come on why can’t you just get up! Pleeeeease stand up and do the thing!! Get UP!!” It can feel like we’re captives in our own brain, unable to move into action. And worse, when we’re completely stuck in place, our thoughts will often devolve into the negative messages we probably heard as kids. “Why are you so lazy? If you cared, you could do this! What is wrong with you?” And so on. The truth is, people with ADHD want to the right thing. We desparately want to just do the thing. But there’s a blocker in our brain. Differences with our neurochemistry mean we have deficits in our executive function, aka the management system of the brain. While we are likely trying harder than most, we may appear to be doing the opposite because of that disconnect from our brain to our actions. All of this can have some devastating effects on someone with ADHD, particularly if undiagnosed: Immense shame and self-blame for the difficulties you face that only compounds over the years Lack of any support, thinking it’s a problem you need to somehow solve on your own Delayed diagnosis and/or treatment One approach to overcoming this is embracing what I call the 4 Cs of Motivation: Captivate, Create, Compete, Complete. Rather then trying to rely on that elusive “willpower” or just “trying harder”, instead focus on how to make a task more interesting (Captivate), creative (Create), competitive (Compete), or urgent (Complete). (In my book, Extra Focus, I dive deeper into how you can apply the 4 Cs of Motivation and why it works for people with ADHD) While this myth can be incredibly damaging, by sharing our experiences and helping to educate those who know us best, we can help to dispel this harmful myth. How has this myth affected your life? Have you found any other strategies that help you overcoming difficulties with motivation and moving intentions into action? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments, they could be incredibly valuable to others in the ADHD community struggling with similar challenges. Leave a comment Stay curious, Jesse J. Anderson P.S. I’ve been thinking about starting something I’m calling Project Sidequest (cuz everything has to have a fun name). Essentially, it’s a list of goals that have no real bearing on my career, income, etc, but are just things I’d like to have completed to become the person I want to be. Goals that “build character” in a way, or encourage me to take action toward something I’d like to do. For example, one goal might be “take my daughter on a trip, just the two of us”, because we don’t vacation much but I want to be the kind of dad that takes his kids on trips. Or “Watch every film in AFI’s 100 Years…100 Movies” because I love movies and want to grow my appreciate for the history of film. Jesse J. Anderson 1d me: I have difficulty with [thing] because of my executive dysfunction. them: Oh, well have you tried fixing that by [using executive function]? me: … 10 3 Jesse J. Anderson 4d ADHD symptoms be like: annoys teachers hard to parent not great at jobs kinda creative? too quiet too loud too sensitive too much 29 This newsletter is supported by readers like you! Become a paid supporter to unlock every article in the archive and gain full access to the Member Resource Hub. Upgrade now START HERE—Welcome to the Member Resource Hub Jesse J. Anderson · May 30 Read full story Refer a friend   Like Comment Restack   © 2024 Jesse J. Anderson 401 Broadway Suite 100 PMB 98829, Tacoma, WA 98402 Unsubscribe