What is an inferiority complex and how do I know if I have one?
We all occasionally get down on ourselves and worry if we're measuring up to the people around us. That's a common experience. (Right?!) But an inferiority complex, characterized by the American Psychological Association (APA) as a "basic feeling of inadequacy and insecurity" based on an "actual or imagined physical or psychological deficiency," is a bit deeper than that.
Think of it like a persistent boogeyman constantly lurking in the shadows reminding you that you're not as good as the people around you, either in one specific thing (like running or flirting) or in general. "An inferiority complex is a kind of chronic feeling like you're inadequate, you're under equipped, you're not good enough compared to other people," says clinical psychologist Ryan Howes, PhD.
This constant feeling of falling short compared to others can be a huge burden and keep you from living your life the way you want. Whether it's sitting out social events, trying to just blend in at work, or going to extremes to make up for feeling unqualified for everyday tasks, an inferiority complex can keep you stuck and unsatisfied.
What causes an inferiority complex?
This brand of low self-esteem is often rooted in the things we're told about ourselves, the way we're treated, and the stories we hear about others and how they're treated. "When you're a baby, you don't have these stories just yet, but as you grow, you're constantly internalizing data points from the world around you," says psychologist Jenny Wang, PhD.
We might subscribe to the idea that we're not as smart or good looking or athletic as our siblings or other kids in class. It could come from a direct comment, like a parent complaining about how much help you need with your homework. But you might also pick up those stories from the way your teachers or peers treat kids who are better at sports or wear cooler clothes or get higher grades than you. "It can be grade school playground stuff or being told you were not very good at something when you were in high school or during any of your formative years," says Dr. Howes.
Of course, it's not just others' looks, intelligence, and athleticism that can make us feel inferior, we can have an inferiority complex about literally anything—including our race or religion, says Dr. Wang. When you witness racism and discrimination in your community or happening to people you care about (or if it happens to you), you can start to feel lesser than others because of your intersectional identity, says Dr. Wang.
When we start to believe that we're inferior to others, we notice the evidence that confirms those stories or biases, even if they're not true, adds Dr. Wang. It can really snowball from there.
Keep reading to learn how to tell if you have an inferiority complex.
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