How can I learn more about myself (besides therapy)?
We're all just out here trying to ~find ourselves~, right? It's very human to be curious about what moves you, motivates you, and makes you…well…you. Which brings us to the fun and sometimes frightening practice of self-discovery.
The American Psychological Association defines self-discovery as "the process of searching for and finding one's unique self or identity." In other words, it's everything that makes you who you are, like your personality, interests, goals, beliefs, values, and cultural background, says psychotherapist Sharon Martin, DSW, LCSW.
Yeah, there's a lot of ground to cover. And because we're constantly changing, it's very unlikely that your journey of self-discovery will be wrapped up in a little bow anytime soon. Honestly, we all might still be discovering things about ourselves when we're 80, and that's OK. The goal isn't to figure yourself out as fast as possible. So, what is the point?
Self-discovery is important for your mental health and self-love for a few reasons. When you know what matters to you and you lean into that, you feel like you have purpose, says Dr. Martin. Also, knowing who you are means you can find people you share similarities with, says licensed psychologist Jeannette Craigfeld, PsyD, helping you feel seen and supported.
While therapy is great, you don't need to be in therapy to learn more about yourself. You can do a ton of self-discovery work on your own, without the help of a mental health pro. Here's how.
1. Spend time reflecting on yourself—by yourself.
It's easy to get caught up in what your family, friends, or society at large thinks is best for you. And it can sometimes be hard to separate those narratives from what you actually desire out of life. So, solo time can give you space to reflect on things that make you who you are, like your interests and values, without feeling like you need to meet others' expectations, says Dr. Craigfeld.
While you're by yourself, try journaling or thinking about these get-to-know-you questions from Dr. Martin:
• What's something I believe in strongly?
• What's been the most meaningful experience so far in my life?
• What do I like to do for fun?
• What are some things I'm worried about?
• What are my goals?
• What am I feeling?
Keep reading for 4 more tips for getting to know yourself better.
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